


Root and Branch

by Anyawen



Series: beekeeper q [6]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: 007 Fest 2020, Genderfluid Character, M/M, Meeting the Family, Shovel Talk, beekeeper q, dialogue only, do not copy to another site, team00
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-04
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:29:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25064686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anyawen/pseuds/Anyawen
Summary: Q takes Bond home to meet his family.
Relationships: James Bond/Q
Series: beekeeper q [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1810954
Comments: 23
Kudos: 88





	Root and Branch

**Author's Note:**

> Fills prompt from 2020 007 fest trope table “The mystery of Q’s name” and is posted on Trans Day.

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?”

“I’m an MI6 double-oh agent. I think I can handle meeting your family, Q.”

“You say that now. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“You _haven’t_ warned me. Is there something you _need_ to warn me about?”

“Puns, mostly. And lots and lots of talk about plants. Ecology, agriculture, flowers, forests, gardening, botany, environmental sciences …”

“You had mentioned that your mother had a green thumb.”

“Oh, that’s not the half of it. She’s a botanist. Dad’s an arborist. Their names are Ivy and Herb. Our last name is Gardner. We’re all named after trees.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes. Don’t look at me like that, you’ll find out soon enough.”

“So, lots of plant talk from your parents.”

“Not just them. Juniper is a florist, Linden is an environmental scientist, Willow is an irrigation engineer, and Cedar is a plant geneticist.”

“And you work with computers.”

“Yes, well. I'm the black sheep that can’t keep a ficus alive.”

“You keep bees.”

“Last I checked bees are not plants.”

“They’re pollinators, though. I think that qualifies you to lay claim to your family’s vocation.”

“Tangentially, perhaps.”

“Then there are the cats.”

“Also not plants.”

“They do a good impression, though, spending twenty three hours a day lounging in the sun. But, aside from that, I was just thinking that you seem to have followed in your parents’ footsteps when it comes to naming conventions.”

“Nettle and Briar are perfectly good names.”

“ _Plant_ names.”

“Yes, all right, true.”

“So, you’ve now warned me that dinner conversation is likely to include a discussion of what sorts of plants they’ll use to disguise my grave if I break your heart.”

“No grave - woodchipper, thermophilic bacteria, and a stainless steel compost tub.”

“Should I be worried about how much thought you’ve given this?”

“Oh, no. It’s the same plan they’ve had for anyone I brought home since secondary school.”

“Who knew that gardeners could be properly menacing?”

“You’ve clearly not spent enough time around plant fanatics. They’re terrifying.”

“Well, it’s a good thing then that I’ve no intention of breaking your heart.”

“I’m certainly glad to hear it.”

“Ready to introduce me, then?”

“Hmm. Two more things first, then we’ll go in.”

“Okay.”

“Linden is genderfluid. I don’t know which gender they’ll be presenting today, and it may change tomorrow. They usually wear a colored bracelet to denote which pronouns they prefer, so if you see an orange band use he/him, and if you see purple use she/her.”

“You said ‘usually’, so sometimes there’s no bracelet. What then?”

“They/them.”

“All right. And the second thing?”

“My name. I want you to hear it from me before you hear it from them.”

“I’d like that very much.”

“It’s Rowan.”

“Rowan Gardner.”

“That’s me, yes.”

“Thank you. Now. Let’s go inside so I can meet your parENTS.”

“You did _not_ just say that.”

“What? You said there would be puns? I can be punny!”

“You’re lucky I love you.”

“Yes, I absolutely am.”

**Author's Note:**

> ... I did not intend for this or several other fics to all fit into the beekeeper Q series, but I keep finding little details that tie one to another, and so they all tie back to that one, and that one ties back to '[not] strictly official', so basically I've woven a giant spider's web and I'm mixing my insect metaphors. /shrug. Bring on the bees.


End file.
